Mar 302012
 

Arguing isn’t always a bad thing. In fact, it’s a necessary part of a healthy relationship.

There’s a big difference though between fighting and arguing, and it’s important to both know the difference and know how to communicate effectively.

 

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 Posted by on March 30, 2012
Mar 242012
 

The best way to get out of the friend zone is by staying out of it in the first place. Check out this video on how to avoid being thrown into a girl’s friend zone.

 Posted by on March 24, 2012
Jan 242012
 

What Attracts Women?Do women look at you and think you’re worth dating?

Do they think you’re relationship material?

High value women can tell in an instant if you’re a date or a dud. Everything from the way you hold yourself to the way other people react to you gives her the information she needs to make a decision.

Take a look at our checklist and see how you stack up.

#1. First Impression

Before you open your mouth, and possibly before you even notice her, she’s already forming an impression of you. Are you well groomed? Are you well put together? Do you look nervous?

If you don’t look like you give a shit about your appearance, you’re already dead in the water. I’m not saying you need to be Giorgio Armani, but you do need to make sure your nose hair stays in your nose.

Be comfortable in a social atmosphere, and if you aren’t, try your best to fake it for now. Maintain good posture, solid eye contact, and project your voice. Go out more, get used to mingling with others, and eventually being confident and comfortable will come naturally.

#2. Your Non-Verbal Giveaways

Don't be nervous on a dateIt’s impossible to monitor and control each of your thousands of subtle non-verbal giveaways. Lots of guys try to do this  and they come across as awkward and unnatural, so instead focus on the things that cause you to display unattractive non-verbal cues in the first place.

One of the best things you can do is get comfortable with who you are. As cliché as it sounds, it’s true – if you don’t like you, and you aren’t happy with who you are, no one who is satisfied with who they are is going to like you.

Figure out what value you bring to the table; what can you offer that other guys can’t?

When a guy is uneasy in his own skin it’s extremely unattractive to women. Know who you are, what you’re about, and be proud of it.

#3. Are You Inexperienced?No experience? Hire a dating coach and get out there

When an attractive woman is screening for a potential date, she doesn’t want a guy she has to teach along the way. She wants a guy who knows how to take charge, who is accustomed to being around attractive women, and who has seen a thing or two in life; not a guy who acts like it’s his first time talking to a hot girl.

If you have no life experience – especially in terms of dating – it’s going to be difficult to be a fun, interesting, value giving guy. If you have great stories, cool experiences, and lots to share, you have lots of value to give. Ultimately, the most attractive thing to a woman is value, so get out there and live a little.

#4. How Do You Handle Relationships?

If you have no idea about relationships, you’re probably going to screw a few up. That’s OK – it’s part of the process.

Like anything though, it helps to know someone else who has already made a bunch of mistakes so you don’t have to. Take our in person dating bootcamp, and we’ll fly to your city and teach you 1-on-1 for an entire weekend. We’ll pinpoint the things that are holding you back and coach you through your biggest obstacles, then break down the dating process so you can start dating RIGHT AWAY. Click here for more info.

If that’s not an option, you can take our online course from the comfort of your own home. It covers everything you need to know if you want to attract and date a high quality girl, and includes four FREE 1-on-1 Skype coaching sessions. Click here to learn more.

 

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 Posted by on January 24, 2012
Dec 282011
 

Why Do Girls Cheat?

 

Why do girls cheat?

At some point or another, almost everyone goes through it.

It starts with questions: Why? Why did you do it? Next is usually anger, followed by feelings of inadequacy, perhaps a good ole month or two (or four, or ten…) of depression, and eventually recovery.

Asking why girls cheat as if there’s one blanket statement to explain it all is ridiculous. When girls decide to cheat it’s usually a combination of several things, but sometimes it isn’t: sometimes they’re just insecure, validation seeking whores.

Assuming the latter isn’t the case, what are some of the common explanations of why girls cheat?

Well, there’s an evolutionary bit saying they want Mr. Good Genes around the time of ovulation; there’s a common sense bit saying if they aren’t satisfied they’ll turn to others for satisfaction, and there’s the bitter man’s view that all women are just insecure, validation seeking whores.

 

Women cheat when they feel a lack of satisfaction in their relationship, usually related to a lack of passion from their man.

 

Basically, if a girl feels like you don’t want to fuck her brains out like you used to, she will be tempted to find someone else who does. Especially if she’s hot. And she better be – if you’re a regular reader who doesn’t have a hot girlfriend, click here to find out how to get one.

I recently did a video where I rant (in HD, for your viewing pleasure) about how dumb it is to worry about girls being cheating due to factors outside your control. Regardless of why she cheats, the only factors you should even acknowledge as existing are ones you can do something about.

Watch the video, and when you’re done scroll down for my top tips on how to keep your girlfriend satisfied. No, penis pills did not make the list.

 

 

 

How Do I Avoid Getting Cheated On?

 

Several people email me this one each week – which is good, because it means me staying up late writing this might help someone, somewhere. Here are some of the best ways to make sure you keep your relationship on the up and keep your woman satisfied.

1) Stop Dating Backwards

Guys put their best foot forward in the beginning, often bringing a girl surprise flowers, taking her to dinner, and being so adventurous Indiana Jones looks like a doofus by comparison. No woman wants to stay in a relationship that gets worse as it goes, but that’s almost always the case.

Guys set the bar high then let it slip as the relationship moves on, resulting in the girl feeling disappointed and unsatisfied.

2) Make Her Come

The importance of great sex is almost never given proper attention.

Be open minded, and NEVER make her feel judged. Encourage her to talk to you and explain what she wants and how she likes it. Use toys! Lots of guys seem intimidated by this, but it’s really not that hard – women LOVE vibrators. Go get a small one, but make sure it’s got some kick (if you get a big one it makes certain positions difficult) and leave it on the bed with a sexy outfit of some kind.

She might be too nervous or shy to do use the new stuff right away, but her seeing you’re serious and open to kinky shit will reassure her that you won’t be a dick if she opens up about her freaky fantasies.

3) Communicate Effectively

Cliche time!

Really though, it’s amazing advice. If you don’t communicate well, she won’t feel comfortable bringing things up with you. If you get angry or defensive when she critiques you or voices concerns, she’ll communicate with Bob down the street instead.

Be open minded, relaxed, and learn to roll with the punches. Don’t get mad at her if she tells you you suck in bed or she’s feeling unhappy lately, be grateful you have a solid woman who comes to you instead of running to someone else.

Lead by example and talk to her when you have issues.

 

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 Posted by on December 28, 2011
Aug 152011
 

When you hear someone ask how to get women, the response is always something related to having better ‘game’. Most dating instructors and coaches break it down further, into phone game, day game, club game, and about every other conceivable variation of game you can imagine. While these microcosms are useful for targeting specific problems, like guys who are great until they get a girl on the phone, in my experience more progress is achieved when men work on their overall lifestyle.

Back in the mid 90’s, there was a men’s movement – facilitated mainly through internet forums – involving a bunch of guys who reverse engineered how to attract women. These ‘pick up artists’ (or PUAs) would observe successful guys and study common factors in their interactions, until they could isolate certain things the successful guys were doing. They made it into this wildly complicated process involving routines, lines, formulas, and entire manuals with step by step instructions. Some guys memorized over two hours of rehearsed material.

These imitators completely missed the core essence of why the successful guys do well. Instead of looking at the lives of these successful guys, finding commonalities, and then changing their own lives, they just copied successful behaviours. They never improved themselves; they just put up a façade of being cool and interesting. After they ran out of rehearsed material, the curtains lifted and the girls were gone.

I spoke about this at the Alberta Social Summit, check it out:

 

 

Sometimes these imitator types would get into a relationship, but it would fail miserably because of the gnawing insecurities underneath their polished exterior. Instead of just improving game or social skills to get better with women, I’m suggesting guys build total attractiveness and value as a man. There’s no denying a guy needs to be socially intelligent to do really well, but the key to meeting and getting quality girls is being a quality guy.

A few months ago, a friend of mine contacted me asking for advice. He was an emotional wreck. He slept with 56 girls last year, and he no longer felt any enjoyment from sex. When he felt sad or empty he would call girls over, and this worked for a while, but eventually the emptiness wouldn’t go away regardless of who was around. He couldn’t maintain a relationship for more than a month or two and was on a downward spiral.

If you focus hard enough on social skills, eventually you’ll become insanely good at attracting women. The problem is so many guys build up incredible social skill sets without a foundation, and like anything else not properly built, fall apart. To attract women, it’s necessary to realize why the successful guys behave the way they do. For the most part, it comes down to having a balanced, fulfilling, exciting lifestyle.

You don’t need fancy lines or cold reading skills; you just need to be a well-balanced, socially intelligent guy. Having a career you’re passionate about, developing a style that reflects who you are, being satisfied with your body, building a solid social circle, and doing fun things are all examples of ways you can be a naturally attractive person. All of these things will make you happier, more confident, and open the door to new social connections.

If you’re ready to start making positive changes in your life, contact us for a FREE consultation.

 

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 Posted by on August 15, 2011
Jun 272011
 

Whenever you interact with someone, your brain is constantly monitoring their behaviours, their body language, and the way others react to them in order to establish their social standing. Ever notice how people are reserved when they first meet each other, or how people don’t really open up until they have a ‘feel’ for one another? There’s a good reason for this – read on.

In social animals like humans, making a social mistake can be costly. To avoid this, evolution has gifted humans with a sort of social radar, a part of the brain that constantly pings others for indicators of social value. Social animals do this to determine the social status of others around them, which is important so they have an idea of how to behave in an acceptable way.

Before going any further into the article, watch this video of an unemployed, average looking guy competing for women against a rich, better looking dude – and destroying him. After the video I’ll explain how it makes perfect sense that the poorer, uglier guy wins.

 

 

The concept of social value is so important because of a loophole in the way people perceive it. If the way you act is consistent with the way high value people act, it doesn’t matter if you’re ACTUALLY a high value person or not. The video above shows a guy who isn’t good looking, rich, or powerful walking up to some of the hottest girls in the club and generating attraction. It’s not money or good looks that get women; it’s the confidence and swagger that usually go with those things.

 

Do good looks get women?

 

If good looks got women, every good looking dude would have a hot girlfriend. If you’ve ever left your basement, you’ve seen tons of good looking guys with average or below average looking girls. The same thing can be said about money. The only real consistent factor in guys who have great girlfriends (and great friends in general) is high social value.

To understand how girls feel when low value guys hit on them, think about the feeling you get when a homeless person approaches you. Here’s a story that explains this phenomenon perfectly:

When I see a homeless person approaching me, I KNOW they can’t offer me anything and are only interested in taking value from me, so I shut them down. One time when I told a homeless dude to get lost, he stuck around and started making jokes, and I laughed a bit. I started to ease up, and within a minute or so my opinion of him changed so I gave him a couple bucks.

 

Hot girls go through the EXACT SAME sequence of emotions with guys.

 

They’re so used to getting bombarded by loser guys that they immediately shut most guys down, and it’s an effective filter. Low value guys give up at the first sign of challenge. High value guys are used to challenge and know that sometimes you have to push through a bit of adversity before you succeed.  She doesn’t know if you’re cool or not, so you have to put yourself in a situation where she can see it.

Cultivating value takes time. Obviously you can’t just wake up one day and decide you’re a high value guy; like anything it starts as an idea, if the idea seems reasonable it becomes a belief, and if you have enough experience supporting the belief it becomes knowledge. Everyone has some idea of what kind of guy gets the best girls. If you don’t match your idea of the ‘worthy’ guy, start improving yourself and improving your lifestyle until you become the worthy guy.

Be the party instead of looking for the party. Be an exciting, interesting, passionate person who contributes and enhances whatever is going on. Develop your social awareness, and if you feel drawn to someone, think about why you’re drawn to them and incorporate it into your own lifestyle.Think about the coolest guy you know and what makes him different from you. Consider your role models and why you admire them. Work on yourself until your positive beliefs become knowledge. Most of all, have fun.

 

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 Posted by on June 27, 2011